How to Make Yourself Work When You Just Don’t Want To
There’s that project you’ve left on the backburner – the one with the deadline that’s growing uncomfortably near. And there’s the client whose phone call you really should return – the one that does nothing but complain and eat up your valuable time. Wait, weren’t you going to try to go to the gym more often this year?
Can you imagine how much less guilt, stress, and frustration you would feel if you could somehow just make yourself do the things you don’t want to do when you are actually supposed to do them? Not to mention how much happier and more effective you would be?
The good news (and its very good news) is that you can get better about not putting things off, if you use the right strategy. Figuring out which strategy to use depends on why you are procrastinating in the first place:
Reason #1 You are putting something off because you are afraid you will screw it up.
Solution: Adopt a “prevention focus.”
There are two ways to look at any task. You can do something because you see it as a way to end up better off than you are now – as an achievement or accomplishment. As in, if I complete this project successfully I will impress my boss, or if I work out regularly I will look amazing. Psychologists call this a promotion focus – and research shows that when you have one, you are motivated by the thought of making gains, and work best when you feel eager and optimistic. Sounds good, doesn’t it? Well, if you are afraid you will screw up on the task in question, this is not the focus for you. Anxiety and doubt undermine promotion motivation, leaving you less likely to take any action at all.
What you need is a way of looking at what you need to do that isn’t undermined by doubt – ideally, one that thrives on it. When you have a prevention focus, instead of thinking about how you can end up better off, you see the task as a way to hang on to what you’ve already got – to avoid loss. For the prevention-focused, successfully completing a project is a way to keep your boss from being angry or thinking less of you. Working out regularly is a way to not “let yourself go.” Decades of research, which I describe in my book Focus, shows that prevention motivation is actually enhanced by anxiety about what might go wrong. When you are focused on avoiding loss, it becomes clear that the only way to get out of danger is to take immediate action. The more worried you are, the faster you are out of the gate.
I know this doesn’t sound like a barrel of laughs, particularly if you are usually more the promotion-minded type, but there is probably no better way to get over your anxiety about screwing up than to give some serious thought to all the dire consequences of doing nothing at all. Go on, scare the pants off yourself. It feels awful, but it works.
Reason #2 You are putting something off because you don’t “feel” like doing it.
Solution: Make like Spock and ignore your feelings. They’re getting in your way.
In his excellent book The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can’t Stand Positive Thinking, Oliver Burkeman points out that much of the time, when we say things like “I just can’t get out of bed early in the morning, ” or “I just can’t get myself to exercise,” what we really mean is that we can’t get ourselves to feel like doing these things. After all, no one is tying you to your bed every morning. Intimidating bouncers aren’t blocking the entrance to your gym. Physically, nothing is stopping you – you just don’t feel like it. But as Burkeman asks, “Who says you need to wait until you ‘feel like’ doing something in order to start doing it?”
Think about that for a minute, because it’s really important. Somewhere along the way, we’ve all bought into the idea – without consciously realizing it – that to be motivated and effective we need to feel like we want to take action. We need to be eager to do so. I really don’t know why we believe this, because it is 100% nonsense. Yes, on some level you need to be committed to what you are doing – you need to want to see the project finished, or get healthier, or get an earlier start to your day. But you don’t need to feel like doing it.
In fact, as Burkeman points out, many of the most prolific artists, writers, and innovators have become so in part because of their reliance on work routines that forced them to put in a certain number of hours a day, no matter how uninspired (or, in many instances, hungover) they might have felt. Burkeman reminds us of renowned artist Chuck Close’s observation that “Inspiration is for amateurs. The rest of us just show up and get to work.”
So if you are sitting there, putting something off because you don’t feel like it, remember that you don’t actually need to feel like it. There is nothing stopping you.
Reason #3 You are putting something off because it’s hard, boring, or otherwise unpleasant.
Solution: Use if-then planning.
Too often, we try to solve this particular problem with sheer will: Next time, I will make myself start working on this sooner. Of course, if we actually had the willpower to do that, we would never put it off in the first place. Studies show that people routinely overestimate their capacity for self-control, and rely on it too often to keep them out of hot water.
Do yourself a favor, and embrace the fact that your willpower is limited, and that it may not always be up to the challenge of getting you to do things you find difficult, tedious, or otherwise awful. Instead, use if-then planning to get the job done.
Making an if-then plan is more than just deciding what specific steps you need to take to complete a project – it’s also deciding where and when you will take them.
If it is 2pm, then I will stop what I’m doing and start work on the report Bob asked for.
If my boss doesn’t mention my request for a raise at our meeting, then I will bring it up again before the meeting ends.
By deciding in advance exactly what you’re going to do, and when and where you’re going to do it, there’s no deliberating when the time comes. No do I really have to do this now?, or can this wait till later? or maybe I should do something else instead. It’s when we deliberate that willpower becomes necessary to make the tough choice. But if-then plans dramatically reduce the demands placed on your willpower, by ensuring that you’ve made the right decision way ahead of the critical moment. In fact, if-then planning has been shown in over 200 studies to increase rates of goal attainment and productivity by 200%-300% on average.
I realize that the three strategies I’m offering you – thinking about the consequences of failure, ignoring your feelings, and engaging in detailed planning – don’t sound as fun as advice like “Follow your passion!” or “Stay positive!” But they have the decided advantage of actually being effective – which, as it happens, is exactly what you’ll be if you use them.
Related Blogs
-
Feb 9, 2024Striking the Right Balance…
In today's competitive job market, hiring managers face the difficult challenge of finding the perfect candidate who possesses both the necessary technical proficiency and the..
-
Dec 1, 2023The Future of Work:…
In recent years, especially during and after the pandemic, the need for remote and hybrid positions increased in Cyprus. Remote and hybrid working was really..
-
Sep 15, 2023Employee Well Being –…
Employee Well Being - HR Function which evolves to a full time dedicated role for Organizations who invest in their employees. HR Executives are giving..
-
Jul 21, 202318 Valuable HR Lessons…
While formal education provides a solid foundation for a career in human resources (HR), there are certain invaluable lessons that can only be acquired through..
-
Jun 23, 202311 Words To Describe…
When it comes to hiring someone for their team, nearly every employer likely already has an image of their ideal candidate in mind. Whether it’s..
-
May 12, 2023When Focus Beats Options:…
Developing new business relationships can be tricky. The development professional works towards a deal, the hours rack up, and yet there is no certainty of..
-
Apr 28, 2023The Evolving Science Of…
April is Stress Awareness Month, when there will be a flurry of articles about managing stress. That is a good thing, up to a point...
-
Apr 21, 2023The Power Of Mindset:…
I’ve recently finished writing a book on essential future skills, and if I had to pick one skill that underpinned all the other skills in..
-
Mar 10, 2023Why Prioritizing Soft Skills…
Soft skills are the personal qualities that enable an individual to communicate effectively, work well in a team, and adapt to changing situations. In today's modern workplace,..
-
Feb 3, 2023How HR Professionals Can…
Some could easily argue that the human resources (HR) department is not a "revenue-generating" service. We don't create new products, interface with the traditional customer daily, or..
-
Jan 27, 2023Why You Feel Guilty…
When I ask people how spending money makes them feel, so many of them respond, “Guilty.” They’ll give an example of how a rough day..
-
Jan 13, 2023Why Most New Year’s…
It's incredibly hard to break out of old habits. Did you look forward to the holidays for a short rest to recharge your batteries, reflect..
-
Dec 2, 2022Why Startup Companies Need…
Developing an active HR function in your business show that you value your employees and their business in your enterprise Growing startups and small and..
-
Nov 4, 2022Your Company’s Greatest Investment…
In this competitive market, companies are struggling to not only retain but also grow their talent pools as they expand. Attractive salaries are important, but..
-
Oct 27, 202210 Tips to Motivate…
Nothing is better for the bottom line than employees who are motivated to work for psychic benefits. Are you looking for ways to motivate your..
-
Oct 7, 2022The Power Of ‘One’:…
The power of one is mesmerizing. We don't realize it, but it can change how we see things. It can help us focus and help..
-
Sep 30, 2022How To Successfully Promote…
Businesses used to have a relatively easy time finding talented employees to fill all their job vacancies. That changed in 2021 when 47.4 million workers voluntarily..
-
Sep 9, 2022How To Motivate People…
As a startup founder, you’d usually spend a large part of your time trying to get various people to do new things. On one side,..
-
Sep 2, 2022Don’t Give Up On…
“Why do we keep following the process if it doesn’t work?” You’ve probably heard something to the effect of this before or have even said..
-
Aug 19, 20225 Ways to Recharge…
Are you the type of workaholic that has a difficult time sitting still during holidays? Do you typically go stir crazy during family visits or..
-
Jul 29, 2022Finding Your Focus Through…
It happens all the time. You start out the day with great intentions to get that financial report done or to work on your marketing..
-
Jul 15, 2022The Secret For Conducting…
A lot can be riding on the outcome of corporate brainstorming sessions. The list includes the need to come up with ideas for the creation..
-
Jun 24, 2022How to Know It’s…
HR activities at startups are often reactive in nature instead of proactive. That leaves gaps in the system. When starting their businesses, most entrepreneurs tend..
-
Jun 10, 2022How to Keep Working…
Motivating yourself is hard. In fact, I often compare it to one of the exploits of the fictional German hero Baron Munchausen: Trying to sustain..
-
Jun 3, 2022Why Setting Boundaries Is…
One of the major plots of the 1989 film Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade revolves around the search for the Fountain of Youth — some magical..
-
May 20, 2022How to Speak Up…
I recently spent a month interviewing the group heads of a large financial services company in order to understand how their direct reports need to communicate..
-
May 13, 2022Be Honest: You Miss…
Loneliness is the top reason why nearly half of the remote workforce wants to return to the office after COVID-19. Here are six tactics to..
-
Apr 29, 2022What to Do When…
The summer vacation season may be behind us, but the holidays are right around the corner. And soon enough your colleagues may be asking you..
-
Mar 31, 2022Work Boundaries: How To…
In today’s ever-moving, practically nonstop working world, many people struggle with setting healthy boundaries. With working from home the new norm for so many, it’s..
-
Mar 24, 2022How to Follow Up…
We’ve all been there. You email someone asking for a conversation, information, input, or an introduction, and you get no response. Whether you are reaching..
-
Feb 25, 2022Go Ahead, Reveal Your…
Talking about office disasters is key to better productivity and healthy competition. We all have our share of office-related horror stories. From the incorrect market..
-
Jan 28, 20225 Ways To Break…
It’s time to face the situation and to find out what you can do in order to break the dangerous cycles. Here are 5 main..
-
Jan 14, 2022How To Give And…
For many people, giving and receiving feedback can be incredibly stressful. When you have poured your heart and soul into your work, having someone offer..
-
Jan 7, 20223 Practical Ways to…
Early in my corporate career, I was masterful at replying to emails instantaneously and staying on top of the multitude of requests I received from..
-
Nov 19, 2021What Super Productive People…
In 2018, I came across a meme that was going viral on the Internet. It read, “You have the same number of hours in the day..
-
Oct 8, 2021Avoiding Negative Emotions Won’t…
I’ve been thinking a lot about dessert lately. What’s the most memorable, delicious bite of dessert you’ve ever tasted? Chances are, it wasn’t a store-bought, plastic-wrapped ball..
-
Sep 30, 2021The Vacations We Don’t…
When was the last date you took a vacation? Did you know that not taking a break also has consequences? The Mexican startup Worky, a..
-
Aug 20, 20214 Tips to Better…
Email is an extremely useful communication tool in business. Less intrusive than a phone call, email is convenient and fast. It empowers entrepreneurs to run..
-
Jul 2, 2021Stressing The Benefits
You may find this article stressful. At least, I hope you will. Because stress isn’t something to avoid or flee: it’s a sign that we’re..
-
Jun 25, 2021The Power Of ‘One’:…
The power of one is mesmerizing. We don't realize it, but it can change how we see things. It can help us focus and help..
-
Jun 4, 2021HR Transformation: Why Diversity,…
If there’s one thing the pandemic has brought into clear focus, it’s what each of us considers important—especially at work. Diversity, equity and inclusion, and..
-
May 28, 20215 Ways To Quickly…
The world is constantly changing, and successful organizations adapt to new circumstances. The ability of organizations to adapt depends on their professionals being willing and..
-
May 21, 2021The Two Levels Of…
Faced with increasing challenges, there are new shifts and changes in today’s corporate world. High levels of competition, new technological advances, demographic adjustments, political turbulence,..
-
Feb 12, 2021How to Collaborate in…
How to adopt the “us versus the problem” rather than a “you versus me” mind-set. Your first step in resolving a conflict should be to..
-
Feb 5, 2021The First Four Things…
Ever find that it’s noon and you haven’t accomplished anything on your to-do list? Get a productive jump-start on the day with these tasks. I..
-
Jan 29, 2021Deep Work: Prioritizing Work…
Fascinated by habits and patterns, I started to observe and pay attention to find value in my day-to-day activities — the ones we always do..